The encounter with my first love

October 5, 2015. Today, I met with the people I had organized for the study group on Facebook for the first time. We had arranged to meet in front of the main entrance of the university and unintentionally blocked it. I was somewhat silent while David, Antonia, and Laura were chatting. Then Wajahat joined us.

A group of students wanted to pass by us, so we had to step back for a moment.

"Are you also physics students?" asked a girl who stopped in front of us. After we affirmed her question, she introduced herself as Jule and joined us. Together, we all headed to the lecture hall where the mathematical introduction session was taking place. When we all sat down, there were still about ten minutes until the start of the session. So, I rested my head in my hands and observed as new students entered the lecture hall and occupied seats as close to others as possible, probably to make new friends quickly. Of course, I was also distracted by the attractive female students entering the lecture hall. One student seemed particularly interesting to me. Not only was she beautiful, but she also seemed somehow different to me because she had seated herself somewhat apart from others. I sat many rows behind her and could only see her long, blonde hair. While everyone was still chatting in the last few minutes before the session began, she seemed somehow alone. Smart outsider women always attracted me. Even though I felt the urge, I had no intention of approaching her, let alone consulting a horoscope to see if it would be worth it. I had promised myself not to search for love anymore, so I had to stick to that under all circumstances.

During the math course, we solved problems after some explanations from the tutor.

"What did you figure out?" asked Jule, who was sitting to my right.

"I still need to think about it," I replied to her, so as not to appear stupid. In reality, I wasn't making any progress in solving the problems. I somehow couldn't visualize the task. And if I couldn't imagine something as a picture in my mind, I usually didn't understand that thing. Probably that's why it was always difficult for me to grasp something right away, because a picture in my mind took time to crystallize.

To distract Jule from my ignorance, I asked her for her phone number to invite her to our WhatsApp group. Then we continued with the calculations. She solved all the problems correctly. When I asked her why she was so good, she told me that she had been good at it in school. She had a grade point average of 1.0 in high school and understood everything very quickly without having to do much for it.

When the course ended after two hours, tutors from higher semesters came to form small groups of about ten students each, with whom you would be associated for a whole week. The tutors spread out along the long table at the front and instructed us to come forward with small groups to the desired tutor. The first dozen students went to one tutor. Then the next group. My heart started racing. In my stomach, I felt this feeling of excitement that arises just before a presentation you haven't prepared for. I felt a strong urge to be in a group with this lonely student. However, I also wanted the people from my WhatsApp group to be there.

"Next, please," a tutor prompted the next group to come forward.

"Shall we?" Jule asked us. The others nodded and immediately set off. Disappointed, unable to answer the question, I followed them. But then—a miracle! I don't know how it was even possible, but out of the many students not yet assigned, she stood up from the front rows and joined our group. Something like that could only be explained by a supernatural force...

Afterward, we went to the Institute for Theoretical Physics, which was located a bit further from the main building. There, we sat in a rather dark, windowless room that perfectly fulfilled the stereotype of a physics room. We had to introduce ourselves briefly and say why we wanted to study physics. Jule introduced herself. Then Niels, then Claudia, who I found interesting, and then Jessica. Finally, it was my turn.

"My name is Alexander, originally from Russia, and I failed the first two semesters. I also didn't attend the introductory event back then. That's why I want to do better this time and join a study group," I said before explaining: "I study physics because, like Einstein, I want to advance the world. My goal is to win the Nobel Prize in Physics."

The tutors, so it seemed to me, reacted with surprise. They must have thought I was totally crazy. At the end of the introductions, we played a game whose rules I didn't quite understand, but I didn't express this and therefore embarrassed myself. Perhaps I shouldn't have mentioned the Nobel Prize, considering this embarrassment. In any case, it was already too late at that moment.

With my group, I had math courses, tours of various university institutions, and visits to pubs for a week. On the last day of the orientation week, during the so-called rally event, the goal was to solve tasks in groups that the tutors had come up with while drinking. The more ridiculous, crazy, or creative you behaved, the more points the group received. I was definitely crazy: Instead of crafting a cape, dress, or T-shirt like everyone else with the yellow bags distributed by the tutors, I put the bag over my head and let Claudia paint my face with lipstick. Maybe she even had an interest in me, because what's clearer than a big red heart on my forehead?

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