Police statement. Fluent Body at wasmitherz. Advantage of wooden tableware. Hair loss has decreased.

October 10, 2024.

Hi! This morning, Julia accompanied me to the bus stop. It's raining, and the weather is gray. I already miss the sun.

It's 9 AM. I'm sitting in the police waiting room. Quickly went to the restroom. Flickering light, like in a horror movie. Changed my mind about taking a dump there. 😅

2 hours later…

I went over the flyer from Zora Hildesheim with the police officer, discussed each accusation, and together we formulated a letter to the public prosecutor's office.

Unfortunately, I have little chance of enforcing a cease-and-desist order on the posting of the flyers, as the complaint is filed against an unknown person. While the person must belong to the Zora Hildesheim organization, it is not known who actually put up the flyers. Additionally, it is highly unlikely that this organization would betray its member.

The most promising method to resolve the case is to write to the Zora Hildesheim organization personally, explain that the flyers are unjustified, and ask them to refrain from posting them.

I should also contact the Kulturfabrik and ask for an explanation regarding the house ban. Although the Kulturfabrik has a managing director who can decide on house bans, the Kulturfabrik is state-funded and financed by taxpayers. Therefore, the exclusion of a citizen must be justified.

I sat down at Espresso House and, using the compact keyboard Julia lent me, drafted a message to Zora Hildesheim.

I am reaching out regarding the flyers distributed in the city of Hildesheim, which publicly shame me, including my full name and photos. These flyers were posted, for example, on Schuhstraße, Wollenweberstraße, and Goschenstraße at bus stops and on utility boxes. Some of them were removed by my sister, as she and my family, who are uninvolved, are also being negatively affected.

The flyer claims that I share the smallest details of women without their consent and behave inappropriately. I would like to refute these allegations.

My journal primarily deals with my life, my emotional world, and my experiences. It is claimed that 90% of my journal consists of my obsession with women. Where did you read this “obsession”? You probably read a section of my life where I was desperately looking for a girlfriend offline. You claim that 90% of the content is about women. What about all the other topics (zero waste, sustainability, barefoot walking, minimalism, family, health, etc.) that concern me and that I write about in my journal?

It is claimed that I mention every encounter by name. For one-time, superficial encounters, the first names are sometimes real (without last names, of course). However, I believe that I am not violating these women's privacy. If this is the case, the person in question can contact me at any time, and I will anonymize the name or details. However, there is the impression that I use real names for ALL people in my life. This is absolutely not true. Last names are never mentioned, and the first names are made up.

If I mention a detail about a person, it is only because it is relevant to my life. For example, writing about mental illness: A woman I once knew is bipolar. This mental illness had a huge impact on my life, which is why I talk about it – not because I simply want to publish details about someone. As mentioned earlier, the people I have long-term interactions with are anonymized in my journal and are aware of it. They can ask me to delete certain details at any time.

It is also alleged that I have “judged, exploited, objectified, and compared” women. Can you explain to me how I have exploited any woman? I also don't know which woman I supposedly objectified. In my journal, I refer to women as goddesses. And goddesses are not objects. The last point, that I have compared women, is true. If I had extended contact with two different women, what’s wrong with illustrating in my journal how these two women differed and what impact that had on me?

The flyers create the impression that I am a misogynistic sexist. However, I am confident that you will not find a woman who would claim that I behaved inappropriately or sexist towards her. After learning about your flyers, I naturally reflected on my actions (see diary entry from June 18, 2024), and I am convinced that I have not acted inappropriately.

Any person who appears in my journal can approach me at any time. I am willing to delete or anonymize any relevant passages that involve my interactions with that person.

Why don't you seek dialogue with me first, instead of trying to destroy my life through bans in various places? Why do you think that exclusion and public bullying are good solutions? Do you really believe that you are achieving something positive this way? You cannot win a war with war.

I enjoy reflecting on my life and am open to reconsidering my actions. I, too, am only human and was not born a perfect feminist. I come from Russia, and my environment, for example, influenced me to be hostile towards queer people. But I don't see myself as a victim of my circumstances. I have changed and now support the queer community 100%. This is why being excluded from the Transeuropa Festival 2024 hurt me even more.

My request to you is to stop distributing these flyers about me.

Thank you in advance,
Alexander Fufaev

When I got home and tried to fix my hair in the mirror, I ran my hand through it and noticed that not a single hair was left on my hand. So, I ran my hand through my hair again, but still didn't see any fallen hair. I tested different spots on my head, and no hair fell out anywhere. I was surprised. Have I beaten my hair loss? I'll keep observing my hair over the next few days.

Today, I ate from my wooden bowl for the second time. I really like it. I think I’ll get a second one for guests. Of course, I ate with my hands. By now, I’ve established the habit of eating with my hands at home. Now I just need to gather the courage to eat with my hands outside the house.

While washing the wooden bowl, I was totally surprised! I had added a dash of linseed oil to the peas and tomatoes, so I expected the bowl to be greasy. It was, but the interesting thing was: I just had to pour warm water into it, swirl it around a bit with my hand, wipe the bowl, and pour out the water – and all the grease was gone. I didn’t need any baking soda to remove the grease from the wooden bowl. With stainless steel, it would be impossible to dissolve the grease with just water. But it works with wooden tableware. How cool is that? 😍

On my way to Hannover for “Fluent Body” at wasmitherz e.V., I had two hours to spare, which I spent at HanoMacke. Wow… my left ear was burning like crazy. Who could have been thinking of me? 😉

Around 6 PM, I headed over to wasmitherz, not far from Christuskirche, for today’s event “Fluent Body.” It’s a guided ecstatic dance.

Elli greeted me with a hug. There were seven of us in a room filled with the smoke of incense and burning sage. I was the only man, which is typical for these kinds of events, as they are usually dominated by women.

It was incredibly relaxing to dance to the (rather calm) music. The movements alternated between gentle and very energetic phases. Sweat dripped from my face as I fully immersed myself in the energetic dance.

One of the best exercises was the partner exercise: my partner could intuitively choose a point on my body. She touched my solar plexus with her fingers, and I danced with my eyes closed around that point. It felt as if there was an energetic blockage there, which I managed to release through this exercise. 👍

After the dance, we lay on the floor, relaxing, while she spoke meditative words.

"In the coming days, you will feel something new. You will feel reborn," she said at the end as we sat in a circle. I'm looking forward to that! 🤩

When I got home, I followed Elli’s instructions and washed away all the sweat, fears and the negativity that I had shaken off during the dance from the inside. I showered and felt reborn afterward! However, I noticed that my hair loss hasn’t completely disappeared, but it has significantly decreased. I’m losing far fewer hairs.

I laid down in bed, wished my girlfriend good night, and started a podcast about remote viewing, or the ability to perceive things from a distance. On that note, see you tomorrow! 👁️